And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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