thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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