a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
