"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize