It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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