You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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