Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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