Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize