I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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