talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize