But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize