When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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