operation harelip BJ is a go
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
