Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
