okay pat passed out under dana's car
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
