So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
