Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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