you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
