I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
