honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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