I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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