Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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