i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize