so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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