When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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