Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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