so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
