I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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