the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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