I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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