My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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