She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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