wat bout pragnant strippers??
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
