I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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