Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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