Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
