and you said cock pushups were impossible
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize