She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
where are my eyebrows?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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