New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
