Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
