Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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