He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
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