He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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