how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
