Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
