I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
