please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
