So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize