haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Randomize
