a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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