hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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